Last night, at the college small group, Aaron had us write down what we were thankful for and what God was teaching us. I think that was a great idea. I don’t think I’ll be able to keep track of the paper that I wrote everything down on, but I figured that I’ll probably have this blog up for a while and it will be a great way to be able to come back and read about what I was going through at this time in my life. So, here are a few things that I’m thankful for:
My husband and my great marriage. I had been thinking yesterday afternoon about how close I was to backing out of my wedding at the very last minute, and how grateful I was that I didn’t. I would be missing out on enjoying life with the most amazing man I’ve ever met. I had no way of comprehending what a great husband would be like at that time.
My job. I remember when I first started working for this company when I lived in Houston. Peter and I were at the end of our rope. We were planning on moving to San Antonio because we had nothing in Houston. A couple of friends that were far too busy to ever hang out with us, no church home, and crappy jobs that barely kept food on the table and a mildew-y roof over our heads. Then I got a call for a job interview. I had talked myself out of going because I was tired of the rejection that I had already faced at countless job interviews that I had put myself through, and we already had some of our stuff in storage down in San Antonio, and we were just waiting a couple of months until our lease ran up to put in our notice. But Peter said that I had the day off and that it wouldn’t hurt to go and see what they said. Yet another reason I’m so grateful that I married such a wonderful man of God. Because I stuck with this job, even though it was extremely difficult at first, Peter and I live here, in the most beautiful place that we’ve ever lived!
Catalyst. When Peter and I were approached and asked to be leaders in Catalyst, we had to think long and hard about it. We were at a good place in our lives, happy with our level of involvement going to a small group for young married couples, happy with how often we were attending church (once a week – twice if you count our small group twice a month), and happy keeping to ourselves. When we first moved up here, we had every intention of getting involved with the youth group but we got so caught up with the emotional and time demands of our jobs that we kinda just lost that vision. Even after we were asked to join the leadership, we didn’t know if we could handle the additional time demand in the middle of the work week. But we felt strongly that it was what God was calling us to do. So, we knew that it wouldn’t be easy, but we were going to be obedient. Since then, we’ve gotten to know a lot of kids, and we’ve been able to speak in the lives of people that we didn’t even set out to minister to. I can’t think of any other time in my life that I’ve been so convinced that I am exactly where God wants me to be.
What God is teaching me right now:
This is something that I felt very strongly about when we were making our decision to get involved in Catalyst. I thought that I had learned my lesson, but in my current circumstance, I guess I needed a refresher course. When God calls you to do something, it probably isn’t going to be easy. If it was easy it wouldn’t be a good sacrifice. I think about the time in the Old Testament, when King David had done something wrong, and God sent a plague through Israel. David caught up with where the plague was and asked God to be merciful and stop the plague. God, being the merciful God that He is, stopped the plague right there. David wanted to build an alter to God there and offered to purchase the land from the owner. The owner offered to give David the land for free. David told him that he wouldn’t give God something that had cost him nothing.
Also, I feel like God is calling me to a deeper relationship with Him that I’ve ever had before. Recently I’ve been noticing that I have been getting very strong impressions of stuff. It’s almost words of knowledge, but not in the way that I’ve always thought of them. But two of the strongest leadings that I’ve felt, I told God, “I don’t know if this is you or just something that I’ve come up with in my own imagination.” Both times that I told Him that, these leadings have been absolutely dead on. So, I think that I’m done testing God. I know that He wants to start moving in my life like He hasn’t done before. It’s up to me to start dedicating to spend time in His word and in His presence learning to separate out His voice from my own. Again, this isn’t going to be easy. I already get up every morning at 5:30, but I’m going to push myself to get up at 5. I’m going to pursue Him in a way that I haven’t before, and I know that He is going to move in me like never before.
