I certainly don’t want to come across as rude, but I need to vent for a minute. Why is it that the minute that someone gets married the relationship has to revolve around the need to procreate? Oh, sure, there is the 6 month to 2 year newlywed time span that people (in general) will accept the laughed off response of, “Oh, we are just enjoying being married, right now!” But I just celebrated being married to an AMAZING man for 4 years. People are getting less and less accepting of that response. NOT that it is any of their business. For the most part people are polite, but what bothers me are the ones who feel that it is their duty or their mission in life to tell me what I am “missing.” So far, my favorite “reason” for having kids is the tax return! Ha! Don’t people realize that having kids changes EVERYTHING??? And this isn’t a temporary change…Kids are FOREVER!!! They change the relationship, the finances, not to mention all of the crazy ways that having kids totally jacks up the mother’s body! It is not a decision to be taken lightly. And to those of you that know us well know that Peter and I don’t make HUGE decisions quickly. When the time is right for us, it will be in God’s timing, not ours, and He will give us the peace and the grace that we need.
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Good blog. Just the right amout of bitter hatred and light-heartedness.
You gotta do it when it’s right for you.
Don’t let the pressure get to you.
Seek first peace. Friends and family change over time. A spouse is for life. God is forever. Isn’t it interesting that often the least lasting relationships put the most preasure on us?
so, when are you having kids, again? i missed that part.
You’re right, kids change EVERYTHING. Do it when it’s right for you. However, until then, your life will be one big void with no tax break. (again, kidding)
I just arrived at your blog, and I must say, wow. This has been an amazing experience. I say, when you want to have some kids, have some kids. And when God wants you to have some kids, you’ll probably end up having some kids. But this “need” to procreate that society (namely, the church) tries to instill is getting to be rather ubiquitous.
Right on Girl! Brand and I have been married 6 years and people are STILL asking us when we are going to have kids. Are lives are SOO crazy with church, work, and stepchildren, that we honestly don’t even think about having kids right now. About once every year or so we will be sitting on the couch watching TV suddenly look over at each other and say … do you want kids yet … NO … is the answer and we continue to go back to what we are doing. I want to enjoy my time with my husband, because regardless of what people may say you marriage changes when you have kids, and I don’t want to wait till we’re both 40 to have that time with him. I’m glad we have waited, there have been couple younger than us who have had children right off the bat, and I “know” they are happy, but they haven’t even established a good marriage before you throw being a parent in there. Thanks SUZY for blogging about this, I’ve endured the same ridcule for 6 years and it’s refreshing to hear someone have the same feelings!
It’s different for everyone. I applaud the folks who want to, and do have kids right away. They’re stronger than I. I think God will give you that peace when the time is right.
Watch the movie called Martian Child with John and Joan Cusack and be blessed.
I’m inspired by it cause he says something along the lines of… “i can’t justify bringing someone into this world, but i can justify loving one that’s already here.”
Kids, no kids, adoption of already born kids… conviction is yours, and the timing will be God’s.
Way to stand up for yourselves.
I’m going to steal your birth control! Wahahaha! :/
(That last comment was meant to bring you laughter). No, but seriously, that would be funny…until you found out it was me. Fiddlestix, I already told you!